🌹🌹MISSING LOVE❣️❣️ Written by Author https://chat.whatsapp.com/L0R1kTwbLv1B8GICdj1t89 Godknows Ncube ✍✍ Book #07📓📓 Read, Share, Comment and Like📓🌹✍ CHAPTER 18 LORRAINE Handina kubvira ndanakidzwa during my pregnancy. Zvainge zvisisaite kani especially knowing the father of my child is in a comma. There was a time where l had cravings ndingadai ndine wekuudza being with amai Nicole was gud she was trying so hard kumira neni. Apart from her there was my mother she would call here and there. At some point l was regretting my decision if only l could turn back the hands of time. Musi wayakarwadza ndakanyatsonzwa pain isingatsanangurike at that moment l felt the pain yandainge ndanzwisa amai Quinton having one's son ari pacomma. Ndairwadziwa zvekuti l thought l might die but my prayer was for my baby to survive. When l held him in my hands that was the best feeling ever. Pakamuka Ishaan ndakatenda Mwari l didn't have the faith saNicole my heart had peace. Becoz during the whole months my heart had only guilty conscience. Pandakabuda going to my ward l was just thanking the Lord chete. Mwana wangu ndakamuisa pabed and started feeding him ndokukotsira. Sezvo aive mudiki aisanyatsa kuoneka kuti akafanana nani. My mom called ndokuti "Nemakorokoto ndanzwa naamai Nicole kuti kwane chimukomana. Mwari vaita havo hauna kuiswa mastitch?" Ndakati "Ndaiswa 3 chete mhamha mukomana wacho aripo." Vakati "Totenda Mwari ende soo kaa mumwe wako hanzi ane matwins mukomana nemusikana." Ndakati "Upi mhamha?" She laughed "Nicole zvee." Ndakashamisika no one had told me about it ndokuti "Inga hake mhamha ini ndotenda nemubodzi iyeye." She responded "Yaah but mhuri iyi ichakunetsera mwana wavo. Vachada kuti ugare naye iye Ishaan urambe wanzwa kaa? Ungaitwe mukadzi wechikwambo pamwe chete nemwana wako." Ndakati "But mhamha l am regretting ini. I think l made a wrong choice fungai mwana wevaridzi dai akafa." Vakati "Siyana nezvinhu zviri beyond your control." I couldn't help but agree. Doctor akazouyawo ndokundiudza kuti ndaibuda tomorrow. Moyo wangu waida kunoona Ishaan pandainge ndamuona he was so pale. After l was discharged ndichienda kunogara kwaamai Nicole. Mafirst days taive bho mhamha vainge vauya. After a week mwana akatanga kuchema zvisina akamboona zvekuti ndakashaya kuti chii. Ndakambofunga kuti mushonga kusvika amai Nicole vati "There is no better explanation to this amai mwana uyu mwana uyu anofanira kuenda kuna baba vake. Amai vako is pretending and all kusaziva but ichi ndochokwadi ukaenda naye uone kuti haarare here haabvume kuyamwa here." Vakadaro apa nemhuri yekwa Chauke we didn't get along. Mwana wacho kuita muyedzo kudaro. I agreed ndokuzofonera Ishaan asina kudaira ndakasara ndisina choice ndokufonera Nicole ndakati "Ndiudzirewo ana mhamha nana daddy kuti mwana ari kuchema haasi kuyamwa ndofunga akuda kumba kwavo." Ndakadaro ndokuti "Iri bho ndovaudza." She hang up. Nicole aimbondi supporter but after that incident haana futi kuzondida. Akazofona achiti ndainge ndanzi ndiuye naye. Ndakasekerera maybe the baby would bring me closer naIshaan. Motikari yakauya kuzotitora ndokuoneka lucky ainge atodonha guvhu pafour days chaipo. Takasvika nothing had changed and mwana ndainge ndakamirira kuti baba vacho vangomutumidza. Ndakasvika ndokumhoresa munhu wese but l could tell kuti ndaisadiwa judging nemadairiro. Mwana uye kumuti zamu mukanwa kwave kunwa zvake. After feeding him kaibva karara. Ishaan akamutora ndokumuisa mubedroom make. Ndaingonyara nyara with my bags. "Handiti muri kuziva kuti naIshaan you're traditionally divorced kaa?" Vakadaro amai vacho l nodded "Gud then munorara muroom yemwana iripo ndimo maunorara wanzwa?" Ndakati "Maita henyu mhamha." Vakati "Handisi amai vako ini dai pasina mwana uyu ari kutibatanidza kana mumvuri wako handaida kuuona ndikuzivise kupotsa waurayisa mwana wangu. Anonzani mwana wako?" Ndakati "Haasati ane zita uyu?" Vakashamisika "Inga mashura asi pamunoenda naye kuchipatara havabvunze kani?" Ndakati "Ndange ndakamirira Ishaan to recover and name him." Vakati "Hoo wazvinzwa Ishaan." Ainge atosimbawo nerasta range raitaridza kuti ainge asina time ari gadzirisa ndokuti "Anonzi Miracle mhamha." He said amai vacho ndokuti "Wagona kani mazita ari pamba pano waQuinton ndiwe futi wakatumidza Hope." Vakadaro ndokusmiler achiti "Varipiko amainini vangu amai Hope?" Zvikanzi "Vari muroom mavo." He smiled ndokuti "Mhamha as soon as l recover zvekudaro kwete izvi zvekunyepedzera ooh ndopika ndinogona kuvatengera imba ini amai Hope mhamha. That woman she is brave and prayerful. Amai vangu u didn't have faith kana hope mamuri l couldn't wake up or talk but her prayers ndaimanzwa mhamha. I was trying so hard kumuka mhamha for her. Mukadzi igamba mhamha l would like to appreciate her mhamha. Zvekuti when she heard about Quinton's condition akamira naye. Yesterday vaitaura kuti she wants to go with me for therapy mhamha. Munin'ina wangu akazvibatira mhamha munhu ari supportive ndoiye yatinoti in joys and sorrows." Moyo wangu waiita kuboiler just hearing him praise so much Nicole ndakanzwa kubhowekana full time ndokunzwa ivo voti "Zveshuwa we were discussing it nababa vako yesterday kana neniwo l want to appreciate her in so many ways." Ndakabva ndaona kuti vaitowedzera kundisvotesa ndokuti "Mhamha let me go to my son ari ega." Ndakadaro "Iri bho kunyangwe hazvo ange ane mamwe masiblings ake nekuti patange tichitaura ndaona Quinton achienda naye to his room kunana Hope uko." I nodded ndokuramba ndakagara. Mother and son continued talking ini ndakanyarara. Quinton uye akadzika ndokuti "Gulez." I faked a smile ndokuti "Bamunini?" Vakati "Muri sei mega mega kubva mati zii kudaro?" "Kk l was just listening to the conversation yamhamha naIshaan." Ivo amai vacho ndokuseka "Motomudedza kuti baba Miracle zvekuti Ishaan zvakapera amai mwana." I nodded ivo mhamha ndokuti "Baba Hope endai nababa Miracle munotsvage nzungu dzakakangwa nezvimwe zvinoita kuti mukaka unyatse kubuda amai two munhu ari kuyamwisa vanhu two monzwa ivava kana pane zvavari kudawo movatsvagira. I will be in my room." Vakadaro "Horaiti pane zvamuri kuda here gulez?" Ndakati "Zvamongotsvagira amai Hope monditsvagirawo izvozvo nema diapers with baby wipers." Ndokugutsurira musoro. I went upstairs kuroom yaNicole ndokuwana akagara zvake ari pafon. "Ndeipi?" Ndakadaro iye ndokuti "Aah mushe ko mauya nguvaiko?" Ndakati "Pane time kana kuuya kuzondionawo vasikana kubva mandirasa kudaro?" Ndakadaro with teary eyes. "Ooh sorry handina kuziva kuti muri pano imi ndingadai ndatouya kuzokumhoresai." Akadaro zvake ndokuti "That's not the case Nicole nowadays u no longer consider me your sister ndofunga inyaya yaIshaan. Waona Quinton auya nemwana wangu. Usadaro but. Remember this is just for a short time unozoona tomorrow tave tese kwenyu uku. Chokwadi u hate me for my decisions and choices here?" Ndakadaro "U know what Lolo l have been avoiding u zvakanyanya. Not becoz of your choices or what. Pano ndofunga uri kuona ndini ndega muroora l have a lot in my plate. Bamukuru havana time vabva kuhospital vanoda kutariswa vadya here , vanwa mapills here? Zvese izvi zvoda kuitwa neni. Right now ndine vana two vanoda kugezeswa kuyamwiswa and l have to spend time with them." Akadaro ndokuti "Hoo if u have been busy now maduties ako atapudzika l will happy u naIshaan. I will make sure he eats and drink his pills ndiye achave responsibility yangu." I said smiling maybe this our only way to get back together."Hakuna chauri kuitira mwana wangu zvako!" Vakadaro amai vacho vachipinda nesadza rezviyo with chicken ndokunditambidza naNicole. "Modya zviri healthy izvi." I nodded rainaka sadza ravo ndokuzonditi "Don't forget wauya pano only for Miracle chete kwete Ishaan no matter what usafunge kuti uri kuzoita muroora wepano never. ISHAAN "Are u happy kuti Lolo auya kumba now is your chance grab it mukoma motodzokerana."akadaro Quinton smiling ndokuti "Handisi kufara kutaura chokwadi zvaMwari chaizvo zvaLolo handichadi unoziva it's not easy kugara 9 months muhospital. I drank the poison by myself handisi kuramba. But exposing me to the whole world was something that l never imagined. There was a time were l thought we would get back together. But now l am definitely sure l will find someone. Her and me were never meant to be. This is my second chance yekuti ndinyatsosarudza someone wandichaudza chokwadi. When l met her today ndaifunga hana yangu icharova kana ndatozvinzwa kuti andibuda chaiko." He tapped my shoulder ndokuti "You're under mother's influence uye ndiye wako unoda kuti mwana akure without both parents?" Ndakati "That's why kune co-parenting. Iye ndamuona kuti she thinks there is a chance for us bodo. Pandakamupfimba l thought she was amai Hope but no she was different." He looked at me ndokuti "Usatsvage mukadzi wangu in a lot of women ndipo pazvinotangira kuchiva mukoma." Akadaro ari serious. I nodded for sure l don't know mweya upi waindishanyira l would find myself staring at amai Hope and admire her. I knew it was wrong but kunzwa vachindinamatira and all kwakauya a negative thought even maonero andainge ndovaita. I don't know but in every conversation l would include her l didn't want to hurt my twin brother l would rub it off at the back of my mind and concentrate on finding a new lady. "Toenda kubarber there is a trending cut yekuti unogerwa une rasta soo." Akati "Enda kunana museyamwa uone unobviswa rasta rese." Ndakaseka "Let's go kuna Billy he knows his thing." Ndakadaro ndokuzonopinda zveshuwa cut yacho yakabuda. Takapinda maTM ndokutenga nzungu dzacho mayoghurts,mandire a lot of this ndokuzoenda kumba. Mwana wangu Miracle ndaimuda asi kwete amai vacho. I uploaded my pictures on social media vanhu chandakaona on social media they are confused chete when they heard l was in hospital becoz of their mean comments vakatanga kutuka Lorraine and the one who posted. Takasvika dinner yave kuda kuservwa l freshened up ndokudzika ndakaona amai Hope vakaisa tuvana paside and Lorraine was doing the same. Ndokutanga kudya tuvana twacho kutambisa zvigunwe zvatwo. "But zita rekuti Harmony ndiro ramaida kupa mwana here?" Ivo ndokuti "Munobhowa ndaida kuti Miles and Miracle zvino zvakaenda nepamwe." Ndakati "Motumidza vamwe vana mainini." Akaseka ndokuti "Ndakatukwa nemunin'ina wenyu bamukuru ndainzwa pain hangu but ndaida kufambira nyaya dzenyu zvino payakarwadza ndakaudziridzwa kusakwana kwese." Ndakaita kuseka ndokuti "Yaah zvakaoma shuwa ndomuziva munhu wangu." We continued talking daddy cleared his throat ndokuti "We have found munhu akadira maphotos pasocial media mamuziva musikana weku leakisa mapictures Sharon ndiye." Munhu wese was shocked "Inga zvakaoma what did u do with her?" Zvikanzi "I gave her a warning which was not her fault at all." He said vachitarisa Lorraine. Uyo akatsikitsira pasi zvake."Saka nyaya yemwana muri kuita sei?" Ndakati "Tichitaita co-parenting daddy. As soon as he grows up tongoita izvozvo." Vakati "Your choices kunyanya." Ndakati "Yaah only left with three months to divorce. Ndaimboda kurwisa but that suicide attempt helped me daddy realize kti there are things that are not worthy dying for. Ndaida kufira munhu anoudza vabereki vangu nezvezvikwambo zvavasina. Vanhu havanzwisise kuti zvakambotiomera." Ndakadaro iye looked aside. Akuda kubatsira gulez kusuka zvikanzi "No siya ukachekwa nebanga ikoko wozoti zvikwambo zvavo zviri kundisveta ropa siya vanobatsirana amai Hope naaunt!" Vakadaro mhamha ainge apusa zvino. U reap what u sow. Amai vake vaaionererwa navo vainge vasipo. Mai Hope vakapedza kusuka zvikanzi namhamha "Bamukuru venyu vada mapiritsi asi makanganwa?" Vakati "Handina l was about kuudza amaiguru. Vanditi vanoda kuita take over taking care of him." Zvikanzi "Ukuda kuzviita wakamira sani amai Miracle?" Zvikanzi "Mhamha he is still my husband hatisati tarambana and l don't see anything wrong with that." Ndakati "Usatye ndinoitirwa naamai Hope unless vane problem zvoitwa namhamha. U weren't there when l got discharged ko ukandipa wrong dosage?" Ndakadaro "Handiti panenge pane mainstructions here paprescription?" Ndakaseka "Chinokanganwa idemo kuti rakambotema muti. The only thing binding us together ndiMiracle. Zvehutano hwangu u don't care about it. Ndanakei chaizvo chawave kuda kuita kunge une hanya? Waisati ndakutyisa ndiri chikwambo blah blah. With the way u insulted my parents ungadai uri kunyarawo but unodziwanepi nyadzi? You're not my wife. We are traditionally divorced! Gupuro rakauya kumba kwenyu don't u dare ever think kuti une chance zvekare muhupenyu hwangu Lorraine. Ndakakubvisa mumoyo chandoda mwana wangu chete." Ndakadaro amai Hope ndokuuya with my pills ndokunwa ndakatora mwana wangu ndokuenda naye to my room. Pasina nguva munhu ainge auya nemonarch. l raised my elbow ndokuti "And then?" Akati "Ndiri kurara muno nababa vemwana wangu and my son. Ishaan stop acting like this. Usaite kunge usiri kunzwa the chemistry between the two of us. I was wrong and acted immature that time ndakavhunduka and zvaityisa babe. Living 9 months without u was a mistake and it was a nightmare. The day rawakaenda kuhospital ndakanyatsonzwa kuti ndokuda and hapana mumwe. I panicked chete but ndokuda l know you're trying to play hard to get but zvakwana wandirwadzisa zvakwana let's get back to being the couple we were." Ndakaseka ndokuti "You're delusional handisi kukuda muno mwana akanetsa ndomuunza kwauri iwewe neni hapasisina kana feeling newe handina." I meant every word. Haana kuterera she acted stubbornly ndokuenda pasofa l called mom ndokufonera amai vake vakamuudza whatever she was told forced her to take her monarch to the spare ndokundisiya nemwana. Akatanga kuchema kuma 12 and ainge akuramba kupa mwana mukaka. Ndakagadzira formula ndokumupa ndokurara zvake. End of chapter #18📓📓. Godknows loves u guys ❣️❣️. Keep commenting and liking 🌹🌹. Together we move faster🌹🌹. Stay tuned for chapter #19📓📓.