Patakasangana Tanya Zviya zvinonzi from grace to grass, from something to nothing is real. Zvakaitika sekutamba sekuseka sekubwaira kweziso. Who would think kuti ini zvangu Tanya would end up selling freezits paside peroad slay queen anenge ini? Ndikatarisa kwandakabva nepandiri nhasi, all l can say is, patakasangana pakasiya tattoo muhupenyu hwangu. "Ahhh weather iyi haisi yemari mhani. l mean l have been standing here half naked for the past two hours and hapana kana client kana 1 yauya zvayo, I'm getting impatient and tired." Just as l am about to go hangu kumba jagwa remota rinomira pamberi pangu ,the window rolls down and a very good looking man smiles at me, me being me l smile back! I'm a very lucky girl heyy ndinopinda mumota and God, kunhuwirira kwayaiita shame. He tells me his name rinova iro Jayden vanhu vaMwari Jay anotaurisa, anga akutondiudza zvese zvekuti maparents ake akuda kuti aende kuMildives, shame poor guy. Since iye anga ati tiende kumba kwake l had no problem since l knew kuti Chiedza anenge ane client yake ikoko. He is soo gentle, he even asked if I was hungry apa he is a chef by profession. Ndakabikirwa chikafu chainaka and l must confess ever since l started this game of selling my body l have met different types of people and in those people l have never met anyone like Jay. Vamwe ndivo vanongoti "Let's get to business " vamwe ndivo vari rough. After tapedza kudya akandiratidza room yake akati ndigeze. Semunhu anga atonhorwa ndakageza mvura inodziya, ndapedza kwakupfeka t shirt yake yaanga aisa pabed. I waited for him but he never came. Minutes turned into hours then l dozed off. Ndinozomuka kuma around 3am in the morning ndiri mumachira and to my surprise Jay anga ari parutivi rwangu akandimbundira kunge ndaiva ndati ndoda kutiza. To tell the truth the guy never seized to amaze me, kungopfakanyuka kwandakaita kwakatomumutsa. Akandibvunza why ndanga ndisina kurara asi handina kumupindura. Akamonera ruoko rwake muchiuno mangu kwakundidhonzera pedo naye. He seemed to be in control of my body nekuti maclients angu ose andakamborara nawo aisandinakidza but with him it was different. He looked into my eyes as if he was searching for something and for some reason I gave in. Tears swelled in my eyes as he kissed my eyelids. Akandibvunza why ndaitengesa muviri? Ndakamuudza zvese zvanga zvakaitika kudzingwa kwandakaitwa kumba, kubatwa chibharo kwandakaita. Akandimbundira zverudo zvaizvo ini ndikamubatirira sezvo ndakange ndakuchema. lt was God's grace kuti ndanga ndisati ndabatira chirwere cheutachiona. Akanditsvoda ndikamubatirira sekunge aida kutiza. Akabvarura t-shirt yake yandakange ndakapfeka ndikamutarisa ndichishamisika. l wanted to protest but he silenced me with wet kisses, kisses that meant something but l wasn't sure what they meant. For the first time in my life l felt loved. l felt appreciated nobody has ever done something like that to me. Ndakazongoshamiswa yatongopinda yakadaro pasina condom. Ndaida kumusundira kure asi ndaive mudenga rechinomwe. Tapedza takavata hedu takambundirana tichifemerana kumeso. Mangwanani acho akamuka achiti aida kuenda kubasa saka ini l was forced to wake up and leave. Ndakaona the other side of him yaanga asina kundiratidza husiku hwatakange tarara tese. Akandipa mari yemapiritsi ekudzivirira mimba akandiudza kuti ndiende. My heart was broken kutaura chokwadi asi what did l expect. The only relationship was that of mutengesi nemutengi. Sezvo ndaisambobata pamuviri pandaibatwa chibharo ndakanozvitora kuti ini ndiri ngomwa handibare saka mari yandaifanirwa kutenga mushonga ndakatenga breakfast yangu yemusi iwoyo. Ndaifara nekuti akanga andipa mari yakawanda zvikuru zvekuti ndakakwanisa kubhadhara rent nekutenga chikafu. Things went back to normal but l still remembered that day as if it was yesterday. It was already two months later but the wound was still fresh, l felt neglected. l felt embarrassed it was my fault that l opened up soo much to him. Maybe if l had not things would have been better. My world turned upside down when l discovered that l was pregnant. Veduweee ndakachema mai vangu vakange vakafa neHIV kare kare. Shamwari yangu Chiedza akazama kundiudza kuti ndibvise asi ndakaramba. l was attached to the father of my baby even though l knew that he didn't even want to hear anything about me, kwaari ikoko. I decided to keep my baby asi zvakange zvichisaita kuti nditengese muviri ini ndine pamuviri soo ndakaronga zano ndikaona kuti zvaiva nani kuti nditengesere vasikana vaya vanenge vakamira vachitsvaga zvikomba mvura nemadrinks. It worked even though mamwe macustomers acho akange akundida, asi ndakazviudza kuti ndoda mwana wangu abude ari mutano. 6 months later zvinhu zvanga zvazooma manje nekuti ndaisawana vatengi. Chiedza akatanga achibhadhara rent kudzamara zvakumuremerawo. Ndakahodha mafreezits zvakandisekesa nevese vaindiziva ndiri slay queen asi handina kuve discouraged. Pakazongopfuurawo motokari ichena ichida kutenga bhokisi rese remafreezits angu zvakandishamisa ndakatarisa murume aida kunditengera kuti ndimutende wanike ndiJay. Ndakabata dumbu rangu maziso ake achibva amhanyira ikoko kudumbu, zvakamushamisa kuti ndainge ndine pamuviri. Ndakaziva akatoita mibvunzo chete asi haana kunditaurira anything. Akanditi ndipinde mumota ndokubva iye neshamwari yake yainge anayo vatakura stuff yangu kuisa kuboot remota yavo. Akatyaira motokari akananga kumba kwake, l mean l know his house because l have been there before. On the way to his house, vaitaura nyaya iye neshamwari yake vachizvisekera asi ini ndaive ndava worried nekuti l had not told Chiedza my whereabouts. Ndakange ndatengesa phone kuitira kuti ndikwanise kutenga some of the stuff zvepreparation. Takadzika pamba paya but paiita sekunge pane party ini ndakangoti zii ndichiteera mumba muya. Ndakawana munamai vechikuru vainge vakaunganirwa nevanhu vachifara. I only then l realized kuti ranga riri bhavhadhe rambuya vaJay he took me to his room where he asked me to sit on the bed but l preferred pasofa hangu. It was better that way, Jay akandivhunza why l was pregnant and who was the father and ndakamuudza zvese kuti ndaitya kufa that's why l didn't abort and he was the father. Handizive akandivimba here or nekuti akabva andipa basa rekuchengeta mbuya vake since vakange vati kurei. Ndakamutenda because it was more than enough akandiudza futi kuti he would take responsibility of his child. Ndakangoti dai kusangova kutaura nemuromo chete. Nguva yakafamba and zvinhu zvaiendeka mbuya vaJay vaindifarira zvekuti she was the one taking care of me not the other way around nekuti ndakange ndakurirwa my due date was anytime so l was walking on eggshells. In those three months that l stayed with Jay and his grandmother, nhumbu yangu yakatononyoreswa preparation ikatengwa. Things were finally looking good for me. NaJay our relationship had grown stronger sekutamba sekuseka. Takatanga kudanana ndaane 2 weeks ndakugara naye. He takes care of me and our baby zviri very sweet zvekuti ndaitomboita madoubts kuti was it genuine love or aindinyepera. Ndakagara ndichiona tv ndinonzwa kunge ndazviwetera wanike shupa yatoputika. Ndinoudza gogo voita call and shamwari yaJay ndiyo inouya kuzondibatsira kuenda kuchipatara since Jay ainge ari kwaMutare. Ndakabatsirwa nemwana wangu mukomana akafanana nababa kuita his own photocopy. Zvese zvanga zvakarongeka zvekuti taizodischargwa the following day. Baba vemwana vakabva vati vanouya kuzotitora airatidza kufara zvisingaite. Mangwana asvika mwana wangu agezeswa ini ndagezawo tamirira munhu, munhu angauye here? Doctor wangu ndiye akatozonondisiya pagate kumba since aiva family doctor. Ndichisvika pamba ndakasangana nemaziso evanhu akanjenga misodzi, l asked what was wrong and they told me kuti Jay wangu anga aita accident akafira paspot. Taidiwa kunoita identify body. I died a million deaths ndakanzwa moyo wangu uchibviswa pamuviri wangu. l wanted to scream but l couldn't, ndakanzwa kupera mweya wekufema ndiye zii ndakadaro. Ndakazomuka manheru acho ndichirwadziwa nemusoro zviroto zvandange ndarota zvaisandifadza Jay kufaaa. Ndichiri mundangariro hanzvadzi dzaJay dzinopinda nedhuku kuti ndisunge uye ndaifanirwa kuyamwisa mwana wangu. Jay wangu akange andisiya nemwana wake achiri karusvava. Ndaikunda here kurarama ndega ndisina iye mudiwa wemoyo wangu. l cursed the day l met him nekuti dai ndainge ndisina kusangana naye zvimwe dai ari mupenyu nekuti akafa achimhanyira ini nemwana wake. Ndaizoudza mwana wangu kutiii?Ndakadzimbikana moyo kusvika nokusingaperi Jayson akandisiira mwana wake akafanana naye zvekuti ndikamutarisa ndinoona baba vake paari atleast he left me a memory of him, l will cherish till the end of time. Ndingati Patakasangana pakaita ndive nemufaro here kana kusuwa? Unongova mubvunzo unogara uchindinetsa kupindura. The End Story by Tanyaradzwa Catherine Mano