#weeklyword *Aloha*🌺 folks, Waking up this morning, I’ve been battling rejection, disappointment, and the struggle to finish things—especially for myself. I set intentions to journal, exercise, and video diary daily. It started strong, but now I find myself avoiding it, not wanting to sit with my feelings. A part of me whispers that none of it matters anyway. Writing this while fighting off a panic attack, I remind myself of the small wins—I cycled over 15km this weekend, the longest I can remember cycling anywhere. That counts. Moving home is overwhelming at the best of times, but doing most of it alone has been extra tough. I know people have their own lives, and I’m grateful for those I do have, but the weight of organising everything solo has left me anxious and exhausted. Feeling left out, overlooked, and unsure how to navigate it without therapy’s guidance—it’s a lot. I pour out my feelings often, but I rarely get that energy back, which makes me retreat. If I don’t reach out, will anyone? That lingering fear of not being chosen is one of my biggest triggers, making even asking for help feel like an uphill battle. Despite it all, I’m pushing forward. I’ve got tickets for the _Nighttime Entertainment Summit (https://nighttimeeconomysummit.com/)_ this week, and I will go—because I need to find my way into this industry without it costing me my peace. I also worked through half of _the Year Compass Workbook (https://yearcompass.com/)_ while trying to moodboard. Reflecting on the past eight months has been intense, which might explain why I’ve been feeling so overwhelmed. If you’re feeling a bit lost or stuck, *I highly recommend doing it—it’s a great way to process the past year and set intentions for what’s next.* I want to move beyond feelings of abandonment and uncertainty. I want to feel secure in my move and confident in my decisions. And I hope that you—whoever you are reading this—feel supported in your own ventures. But if you don’t, I hope you find the strength to move forward without too much anxiety. If you’re feeling generous, please consider donating to _Black Minds Matter (https://www.blackmindsmatteruk.com/) ._ I give when I can and have even used the service myself. While I was sad when it ended, I was grateful for the support when I needed it most. Also, if you’re looking for a way to get around, grab a £4 ride credit with Lime using this link: _https://lime.bike/referral_signin/R3WDSN4IHJF_ And for the vibes, listen to this mix: Chapter #113 by SASHA MARIE RADIO on SoundCloud. _https://on.soundcloud.com/e4hXgGLzaggdMMHz6_ Let’s get through the week together. 🙏🏾💚🖖🏾