Asking an apology when someone says they are hurt or upset gets you ahead in the relationship even if you are right. Asking people to apologise doesn’t help you get ahead. Apology is a powerful tool to build and re-build relationships. If apology is an act of love then apologising increases love. If it is an act of forceful submission, it causes pain. Pain or love, is determined by the (forgotten) conscious choices we have made in our life.