A man will come in for you, and finds you interested and he knows it. You probably really showed you were interested publicly, so you have several proposals at your hands. To be able to filter through them quickly, you need to have list of deal makers or breakers. For example: What must a man you can marry or bring home be or not be like: - Genotype - Religion - Tribe - Location - Age difference - Single, Married, Divorced, Single father? - Short term goal? - Parentage composition These are things you can find out quickly before the conversation goes any further. You do not need to first see, pretend you are being interested in someone, to get them to open, to know these information. If they want the conversation to go further, they need to make sure you are comfortable with your preliminaries. Everyone has a preliminary! They're critical to know before anything akeen to next step or a feeling of "talking stage" even begins. And you can have your personal characteristics you'd prefer to know. Fee free to ask them. Before you even begin to worry about their intentions. When you have sieved through the list and ended up with a couple who deserve the next step, then go into deeper conversations. Daily chats about anything and everything. About you and them. Handle things in your preferable pace. Don't drag pointless conversations for too long though, a date must be planned. And since you feel unsure about many of them, then pick a place with no expectation of sex after. Not everyone should have sex on the first date, even though there's no significance to it anyway. Agree to a date, to see them in person. This helps you to filter the list further. You'll find yourself getting closer to the kind of man you are willing to relinquish control to. Because right now you may be afraid of letting any of them take control or for afraid of agreeing to their ideas because you are unsure about them. And to be sure, you need to make the effort. This time, you are doing the searching as well. You can not allow to be driven. Otherwise, you'll end up with a wrong man like you have done many times before. Get involved and ask the right question, and push the right activities. You'll get your man.