Ajebo Writer

Ajebo Writer

2/6/2025, 6:35:17 PM

Ever since my mother-in-law came to visit me and my husband, it’s been one complaint after another. First week, she said the house smells like English house. Before she retired she used to work for white people. Cook their meals and run errands for them so she said she doesn’t like the smell because they maltreated her. My husband begged me to change the air freshener, so I bought a cheaper one. The day I opened it, she asked how much I got it. I didn’t want to lie, so I said 20k. She screamed, “You want to send my son to the village o!” I ignored her but she continued. “You’re lucky you have a man like my son to take care of you and provide all your needs. Me, I suffered alone to raise my children.” One time after eating, I couldn’t finish my food, so I went to trash it so I could wash my plate. Mama saw me and started shouting: “See how you’re wasting my son’s money! Is it because it’s not your money? If you had a job, you would value things!” My husband tried to explain that I work remotely and I’m not idle or wasteful. Mama hissed and shouted; “Which yeye remote work? So pressing remote all day is work? Because that’s all she does inside—watching TV, Netfilm or whatever you people call it—while you go out every day and come back to feed her!” Now, I do content creation and crypto. I even earn more than my husband. We have a system that works for us. My hubby loves cooking and he’s better at it. Guess that’s the only good thing he inherited from his mom. So, he handles the kitchen while I shop because I can bargain better. Mama doesn’t like it. I also love good food. In fact, I’m a foodie. Anytime I stock up—bread, drinks, rice, snacks, chicken, everything—mama will squeeze her face till the following day. Yet, she’ll still open the fridge, drink malt three times a day, eat bread, and make thick tea. Tea that should last a month, she’ll finish in three days! Tea and bread, tea and pap, tea and corn, even tea and garri with egusi soup My husband will fry chicken that we’ll use to cook soup and stew, meant to last a week, mama will be picking the chicken till it finishes and washing it down with malt. If I go back to restock she’ll start grumbling and speaking language to herself Anytime I come back from the market, she’ll start her usual investigation. “How much did you buy this one?” As I’m calling the prices, she’ll be shouting and hissing until my husband pulled me aside one day. “Honey, just be diplomatic with your answers.” “You mean I should lie to your mother?” He said, “I’m not saying you should lie, but are you not tired? Just package the truth small small for peace to reign.” So I started adjusting prices for her peace of mind. When my phone started misbehaving, I got a new iPhone 15—with my own money, o! The next day, she asked how much. I told her 15k. She squeezed her face and said, “Hmm, see as you’re spending my son’s money.” Then I bought a MacBook Pro because I was tired of fixing my old one. Mama asked how much again. I told her 20k. Another face squeeze. Then I went shopping & spent over 250k on a full house restock: bag of rice, live chicken, half goat, potatoes, onions, beans, garri, drinks, beverages, detergents, everything. Mama: “How much for everything?” Me: “30k.” She squeezed her face small and took one malt and shortbread and went inside. Later, she came out, made thick tea, and carried some of the goat meat my husband fried. Now, it’s time for her to leave. She called me to the parlor and brought out 40k. “Oya, use this money to buy me iPhone 16, and that Emma Book Pro (MacBook Pro), and use the change to buy a bag of rice.” I smiled and said, “Mama, don’t worry. Your son will send it to you.” She shouted, “No! I don’t want to finish my son’s money the way you’re doing. Use my money!” Now, she says she won’t leave until I get everything for her. I can’t tell her the real amount, she’ll have a stroke. If I don’t get it, she’ll say I hate her and complain to my husband. If he doesn’t get it, she’ll say I’m the one stopping him. I’m just tired and confused. What do I do? The End Ajebo Writer ©️Kingdavid Chinaeke Ofunne

Ajebo Writer

2/8/2025, 8:48:22 AM

Somebody Cannot Find Good Girl Again? I left slay queens and TikTok babes to find a good, responsible woman. A Food & Nutrition teacher from Ibadan—no Instagram, no drama, just home training. Babe was perfect… until… Read full gist below ⬇️

Ajebo Writer

2/1/2025, 9:54:04 AM

We’re in bed. My wife wakes up in the middle of the night. I’m a light sleeper, so the slightest sound rouses me. “Honey, what is it?” I ask. “I’m thirsty. I want to get some water to drink.” I glance at the clock. It’s 2 a.m. “Okay,” I mumble and roll over. I drift back to sleep, only to wake up again feeling my Wife running her hand up my leg, stopping just short of my manhood. Then she started rubbing on my cap, trying to get me to wake up. She kisses and nibbles playfully on my ear and strokes my face. I stirred a little bit, but I was not fully awake yet. She starts kissing my neck gently, then my chest, and again on my lips while rubbing my preeq with her hand. By this time, I am fully awake and about to come. So, I lean up, balancing myself with my elbows while she takes my preeq into her mouth and gives me a blowjob. I’m surprised and excited. I usually spend days pleading and bribing my wife to suck me, but here she is, without any persuasion, blowing me for free! When she notices that I’m about to cum inside her mouth, she stops and tries to guide my preeq inside her swollen puzzy I smile and help her. Her hands are wet, probably from the water she went to drink. As I slide into her, I gasp. She’s surprisingly juicy and slippery. She starts riding me soundlessly. Since we got married, lovemaking has been mechanical. I come on top, she opens her legs, and we do the missionary style until she cums. But here she is, riding me cowgirl and blowing my mind. For the first time, I cum before her. As soon as I release, she comes down, yet I’m still hard. Smiling, I turn to kiss her and ask what came over her. But then I see my wife sitting upright like a robot. “Honey, what is it?” “There’s someone downstairs,” she says without turning to look at me. Immediately, my erection disappears and panic sets in. I sit still, straining to hear anything. “Are you sure?” Whispering in a voice I hardly recognize, she says, “I heard footsteps.” “Wait here,” I whisper. I could swear she chuckled or laughed, but I couldn’t tell. Maybe she thinks I’m not man enough. Well, I jump out of bed, grab the hammer I use for work, turn on my phone torch, and tiptoe downstairs. As I reach the kitchen, I hear a sound behind the fridge. Immediately, I turn to strike. I raise the hammer and point the torch in the direction of the sound. The hammer drops from my hands. It’s my wife, hiding behind the fridge with a cup of water. “What are you doing here? I told you to wait upstairs.” “Honey, there’s someone upstairs,” she says, trembling with the cup of water in her hands. “I haven’t been back since I came down to get water.” “Who did I just fvck?” The End Ajebo Writer ©️Kingdavid Chinaeke Ofunne

Ajebo Writer

2/4/2025, 5:09:39 PM

I love biscuits. I have a sweet tooth—Hobnobs, Coaster, those N100 and N200 own. I buy them plenty, but my wife? Sugar is her enemy. When we were dating, she tried to stop me. After marriage, she upgraded to throwing them away. If I hide them to eat at night, she’ll find them and trash them like a customs officer. No matter how I beg, shout, or protest, this woman no gree. Even when we go grocery shopping with my own money, if I try to pick biscuit, she’ll say NO. If I sneak it to the counter, she’ll remove it. This woman is ready to disgrace me publicly because of biscuit. And me, I hate drama, so I always let her win. The only time I enjoy biscuits is at work or when she’s out. I even dispose of the wrapper outside so there’s no evidence. Once she sees anywhere I hide them, she’ll say, “God, I married a child. I could’ve married a doctor, but I chose a child who hides biscuits in his boxers. But that’s what she has reduced me to, a biscuit bandit. Yesterday, we went for our usual monthly shopping. As we picked foodstuffs, I saw my opportunity. I grabbed two N200 biscuits and hid them in my pocket so I can pay for it without her noticing. Next thing I heard— “Oga, wetin dey your pocket?” I turned. Supermarket security man. I told him to relax, but before I finished talking, this overzealous guy just grabbed my pocket and pulled out the biscuits! “Ole! Thief!” he shouted, drawing the attention of everyone in the store. Before I could explain, he punched me in the mouth, tearing my lip. Out of reflex, I head-butted him, he fell so I sat on him, strangling him in anger— Then BAM! I felt a painful blow to the back of my head. Two more security guards jumped in and were now beating me like I stole dollars. I was receiving blows and kicks everywhere. My wife came running, shouting, “Leave him alone! He’s my husband!” The use|ess security men shouted back, “Madam, your husband na thief! He thief biscuits!” My wife showed them our trolley: “We just spent over 50k on all this! Does this look like a man who needs to steal biscuits of 200 naira?” Thankfully, a cashier recognized me and explained. They let me go, but it was too late. By the time I stood up, people were recording. I even recognized a few faces from my neighborhood. My reputation as the quiet, handsome, young husband and reserved guy was finished. I just wanted the ground to open and swallow me like Jonah. I bent down, picked up the biscuit from the floor, dusted it off, and added it back to the trolley. Next thing—GBAH! My wife slapped it out of my hands. The walk back home was silent. She kept looking at me somehow. I don’t know if it’s pity, shame or disgust but I’ve quit biscuits. No more sugar again ever. I nearly lost my life and maybe my wife because of biscuit, I no eat again. Let me just be drinking water like aproko doctor recommends. After all, water is life, and happy wife, happy life. The End Ajebo Writer ©️Kingdavid Chinaeke Ofunne

Ajebo Writer

2/2/2025, 5:52:17 PM

Things We Do for Friendship! Ever had one of those nights where you drop everything for a friend? You know, the kind of situation where you don’t even think twice about it? Well, this happened to me, and I can’t help but laugh at the lengths I went to—for what I thought was a genuine emergency. But let me not spoil it. Here’s the wild ride I had… 😅 👇👇👇👇

Ajebo Writer

2/1/2025, 9:53:50 AM

Good morning, my people and Happy New Month! It’s the first Saturday of February, and I’ve got a wild one for you today. Imagine waking up in the middle of the night to your wife being… extra affectionate, only to realize something isn’t quite right. This one will have you questioning reality. Read to the end and tell me—what would you do in this situation? Here we go…

Ajebo Writer

1/31/2025, 6:12:55 PM

Do you think my stories are based on real-life events or pure imagination?

Ajebo Writer

1/31/2025, 6:10:59 PM

All these social media influencers will just be deceiving themselves. Every time, “You’ve never really dated until you’ve dated a white woman.” Or, “Nigerian girls have traumatized us. Try oyibo babes and experience true love.” Even one popular Sir on Twitter won’t let us breathe. Every-time, “Until you date a white woman, you’ll never know what it means to be loved, bla bla bla But when it’s time for wedding, it’s Ada or Temi they will marry. If oyibo love sweet like sugar, why dem no carry am go altar? Anyways, I said I should follow their advice and decided to date oyibo. That’s how as soon as I landed America, I blocked all my Naija babes for this white babe I met on an online dating app Her name is Candy Fox, and mehn she fine sha. She doesn’t have yansh or brezz like our babes but she be complete vibe She was different, I’m not gonna lie. No billing, no urgent 2k or money for airtime. We’d go to a fancy restaurant to eat, and we’ll split the bill 50/50, shopping, she pays her own, I pay my own, no judgment! In fact, that week we met was her birthday. I bought her flowers and card, paper card o. This girl cried tears of joy and jumped on me like I had given her a diamond ring. Hugging and kissing me for paper and flower She even read the card out loud to her friends, and they were clapping. Something ChatGPT help me write. That night she knack me like no Calabar girl has ever knacked me and sucked me like overripe mango. True true these influencers know wetin them deh talk. These Oyinbo women no dey stress person at all. Until one week later… Candy Fox invited me over. Immediately I entered, we started kissing aggressively and ripping our clothes off like Hollywood film. True true oyibo women like segz pass religion. Knacking na nothing for them. In two seconds we were naked and on the bed. My preeq don rise and was just nodding back and front like Ronaldo Next thing, she stopped and said, “Lick my feet.” I looked at the feet, very clean and sezy. I lick. She say, “Suck my fingers.” Her fingers are manicured and sweet. So, I suck. She say, “Lick my ears.” I lick. She say, “Bite my armpit.” Haba. I first sniff… e smell nice. I bite small. She say, “my belly button too.” I smile, I lick her navel for some minutes than I start I started widening her legs so I can penetrate before she’ll say lick my eye but she turned and set doggy style for me Cheeee!!! I smiled and started adjusting my preeq like a responsible man. She say, “No, sugar, not yet. I’m not done with your tongue. You gonna use it some more” I smiled, thinking I know what she wants.” I said, “Okay baby, turn and spread your legs.” She say, No… I should come and lick her anvs. I froze. You say? I should lick your gini? She said she doesn’t know what ‘gini’ is but I should hurry up and lick her anvs. She was still setting doggy and looking at me with one Yeye smile “Wait Ma, I should lick your anvs, as in your yansh, where sheet dey come out from?” I repeated She said, “Ma? Gosh, you’re so funny. I don’t know what most of that means, but yes, bring your tongue over here and lick my anvs. My ex used to love swallowing my dump he said it tastes super nice. I hope you’re ready too cos I love it when my men eat my…. “Bleeeeergggghhh!” I vomitted all over the bed My preeq soft immediately “Ahhhh!!! WITCH!!! AMUSU!!!” I shouted That was it. I stood up, put on my clothes, and ran out from that coven and never returned. Make me, a whole African man, Igbo man, lick woman yansh? chop her sheet? Whether white, yellow, red, pink or black, Yansh na yansh! Yansh wey dem no deh wash well, because I hear say oyibo no deh Baff. Alueme! Abomination! Aluuu!!! Naija girls, please, I’m sorry. Ediddiong, Shola, Titi, Adaobi, Ifunaya, all the babes I dumped and blocked because of oyibo, abeg forgive me. Take me back, abeg! The End Ajebo Writer ©️Kingdavid Chinaeke Ofunne

Ajebo Writer

1/31/2025, 6:21:14 PM

Welcome to the Tribe, New Followers! 🎉 I’m excited to have you here! This isn’t just another channel—it’s a growing community of book lovers, story addicts, and curious minds. Whether you’re here for gripping tales, unexpected twists, or just a good laugh, you’re in the right place! Let’s make this space even bigger and better! Share the link with friends who enjoy great storytelling, and let’s hit our next milestone together. As we grow, you’ll get exclusive sneak peeks, behind-the-scenes writing insights, and first access to new stories. Buckle up—this is going to be a fun ride! 🚀

Ajebo Writer

2/2/2025, 5:52:36 PM

My best friend’s wife called me at 11 PM. Her voice was frantic. “Kings, please, come over now!” Confused, I tried calling my friend, but no response. I sent him a chat—he read it but didn’t reply. Panic set in. I tiptoed out of bed, careful not to wake my wife, got dressed, and bolted to the car like the Flash Arriving at my friend’s house, I burst into the living room, panting like a dog after the maid opened the door. My friend and his wife were standing waiting for me. “What’s going on? What happened?” I asked, my heart racing. The wife held up a flash drive. “I found your flash,” she said. “My what?” I looked at my friend but before I could talk the wife spoke “Don’t look at him, Kings. Look at me. Do you like drinking women’s piss?” My jaw dropped. “What?!” “Do you like licking women’s anus?” “WTF is going on Chinwe? What are you talking about?” “Don’t act innocent!” she snapped. “You’re an usher in church—a church worker! And this is what you’re into, what sort of sick fantasy is this?!” I turned to my friend. “Richard? What’s going on?” Richard sighed dramatically. “I told you to stop, Kings. I warned you!” I was lost. “Warned me about what?!” “Stop denying it Kings!” The wife snapped Before I could process, she went and plugged the flash into the TV. The first scene was horrifying. A naked man was eating a woman’s sheet direct from her anvs I almost vomitted “How dare you bring this filth into my house?” she shouted. “What if my kids had seen it?!” I was frozen in shock. She shoved the flash into my hand. I almost called your wife but my husband begged me not to. Don’t ever bring this into my home again. If you want to watch sick videos like this, watch it in your house. And Kings, you’re disgvsting. I’m disappointed in you.” “Honey it’s okay nau. Take it easy on him.” My friend said. “Kings, come, I’ll walk you to your car it’s late.” I didn’t know how my legs moved outside As soon as the door closed, he dropped to his knees. “My guy, I’m so sorry, Abeg! Thank you for not exposing me! She seized my phone—I couldn’t warn you. I owe you big time!” “Richard, you’re watching this crap?! You swore you quit years ago!” “I have!” he whispered. “It was an old flash. She found it in my laptop bag.” I checked my watch—11:45 PM. I had risked my life for this Id!0t. I walked to the bin and trashed the flash, swearing for him under my breath. But as I drove off, something in my rearview mirror caught my attention. It was Richard. This man was digging through the dustbin like his life depended on it! I stoped and reversed sharply, my headlights shone on his guilty face. He froze, the flash shining in his hands. He started stammering “Kings… em, you see… the kids. They might… uh… they might find it.” I stepped out of the car. “Richard, give me the flash. I’ll trash it in my own dustbin. This p0rn addict said no that my wife might see it and I’ll get in trouble I couldn’t believe this idiot. “I swear if you don’t hand it over now I’ll go inside right now and expose you to your wife and children!” Reluctantly he gave me the flash drive “Bascard!” I cursed him as I entered my car and drove back home and when I was very far away from his house, I threw the flash inside a bush. The End Ajebo Writer ©️Kingdavid Chinaeke Ofunne